Alison And Wendy

Let us do the talking. You just be pretty.



Alison and Wendy are Alison Rosen and Wendy Molyneux. They are involved in various exciting endeavors including book writing, television being on, magazine editing, celebrity interviewing, list making, script writing, comedy performing and, if you are Wendy, buying sandwiches for your sister's family with whom you are going to the zoo.


Need to know more about Wendy's book? We thought so.

LINKS WE LIKE

Corporate Casual
Garfield Minus Garfield
Paul Scheer
Chris Monks
Jeff Drake







Wed Feb 25
Sexy!

Sexy!

Comments (View)

Gloves beneath our gloves

  • ALISON: so I was cleaning my bathroom earlier
  • WENDY: uh huh
  • ALISON: and sometimes I wear those super sexy gloves
  • WENDY: the yellow ones
  • ALISON: to protect my skin from harsh chemicals or something
  • mine are more seafoam
  • WENDY: sexy
  • ALISON: but yes, they're like yellow ones
  • but I think the gloves irritate my skin
  • I need gloves under the gloves
  • WENDY: : latex allergy?
  • that's a real thing
  • ALISON: I don't think these are latex
  • WENDY: and very common according to tv shows about doctors
  • ALISON: they're sheepskin
  • I can really feel the toilet and sink better
  • WENDY: oh, that's very mediaeval
  • ALISON: they're more expensive
  • but more intimate
  • WENDY: i spelled thta wrong
  • and again
  • ALISON: I thought it was olde mediaeaaval spelling
  • like faerie
Comments (View)
Mon Feb 23

It's just Perez Hilton now.

  • {ed. note: this post is about last week's big kerfuffle when tumblr decided to take down a few blogs that were deemed to be too "harrassing" of other tumblr users.}
  • ALISON: so I heard that tumblr put those blogs back up? is that true?
  • WENDY: yeah, they are back up
  • so dumb
  • ALISON: totally
  • WENDY: i wonder if tumblr will take down our blog because we are so negative to ourselves
  • we had to save the tumblr community from self-harrassment
  • any blogger with low self esteem will be censored
  • ALISON: that would be so great
  • ha
  • WENDY: i wish they would
  • ALISON: the internet would be so... small
  • WENDY: yeah
  • it would just be perez hilton
Comments (View)
Sun Feb 22
Alison, Wendy

Alison, Wendy

Comments (View)

"wait, let me put lipstick on this post"

  • WENDY: i am going to try taking snapshots of our chats to post
  • instead of copying and pasting
  • ME: wait, let me put lipstick on this post
  • WENDY: but if your gmail saves it automatically will you email me?
  • ME: ok ready
  • WENDY: open a button
  • another one
  • STOP CRYING
  • I WANT TO TAKE YOUR PICTURE
  • ME: how's this?
  • WENDY: Don't be such a baby
  • ME: I want our chats to be shot tastefully
  • WENDY: you'll never get ahead in this town unless you let me take sexy pictures of your i.m.s
  • ME: well, they're just for your personal collection right?
  • WENDY: hmm. no, the snaps won't work
  • ME: ok let me see if I close this window if it automatically saves
  • hold
  • WENDY: i mean, i can save it too
  • but i thought if yours autosaved it'd be easy
  • ME: yeah I was able to pull it up
  • it autosaves
  • WENDY: sweet
  • ME: awesome
  • so should I put my clothes back on?
  • WENDY: NO
  • i like you natural
Comments (View)
Sat Feb 21

It's not what you're eating, it's that you're eating your mail.

  • ALISON: hey!
  • hello
  • WENDY: i am watching millionaire matchmaker
  • but i should be sorting my mail
  • i hate mail
  • ALISON: I hate mail too
  • in fact, I hardly ever open it
  • WENDY: it's all junk
  • i remember when i was a kid and mail was so exciting
  • ALISON: so when you say "sort" do you mean "throw out"
  • WENDY: shred
  • probably
  • ALISON: oooh fancy
  • i don't have a mail shredder
  • I have to eat mine
Comments (View)
Wed Oct 8
I can’t remember if I ruined the country because I started drinking, or if I started drinking because I ruined the country.

I can’t remember if I ruined the country because I started drinking, or if I started drinking because I ruined the country.

Comments (View)

This blog post is tired of your lies!

  • ALISON: did you watch the debate last night?
  • WENDY: on and off
  • i have mccain fatigue
  • and republican fatigue
  • like it's like being at the end of a relationship with an alcoholic
  • and you look around and you've lost your house and your caar
  • you have a black eye
  • the kids are in foster care
  • and they are like
  • BABY IT WILL GET BETTER
  • and you are like, no, YOU HAD YOUR CHANCE
  • ALISON: and you're like "are you going to quit drinking?"
  • WENDY: right
  • ALISON: and they are like "well, no, but"
  • WENDY: and they are like, no, the drinking surge is working!
  • stay the course
  • ALISON: they are like,
  • thinking
  • I'm thinking here
  • yeah, they are like just what you said!
Comments (View)
Sat Oct 4
Answer your phone, Tom! Wendy wants to talk to you about a job.

Answer your phone, Tom! Wendy wants to talk to you about a job.

Comments (View)

Despite this post, Alison wants you to know that she's still very much single

  • WENDY: are you taking the plunge?
  • can i come to your wedding?
  • ALISON: yes! I was hoping you would perform at our wedding
  • WENDY: sure
  • my yodeling?
  • ALISON: yes!
  • WENDY: or my striptease?
  • ALISON: god I'm so bad at decisions
  • which is more matrimonial?
  • WENDY: or my yodelteases?
  • ALISON: yes! that
  • that sounds perfect
  • it's a theme wedding
  • the theme is "Jamaica me crazy"
  • WENDY: perfect
  • ALISON: and the colors we've chosen are sage and sagebrush
  • WENDY: i'll hire tom cruise circa Cocktail
  • i'm going for a walk now
  • ttyl!
  • good luck
  • i hope you fall in love
  • because i don't hate him
  • ALISON: that's the nicest thing i've ever heard
Comments (View)